Posted on April 28 2024
Hi there, my name is Jaelle.
I am a mom of four kids, 2 girls and twin boys, aged between 7 and 11. I wasn’t aways
sure I wanted kids thinking it would be daunting to have small humans depending on me.
I'm currently the Co-Founder and CEO of The Great Room.
My parenting style is :
Three words to describe my motherhood journey are: Love, Growth, Surrender
Did you always want to have a big family? And why?
I must confess, the idea of having a big family initially seemed daunting to me. I wasn't
entirely sure if I was cut out for it. However, as I journeyed through life and eventually
became a mother, I realized the profound joy and fulfillment that comes from raising
children. Each child brings a unique perspective and adds immeasurable richness to our
lives. So, while I may not have always imagined myself with a big family, I couldn't be more
grateful for the beautiful chaos and love that each of my four children brings into our home.
2. What was the hardest part or jump in the number of children for you?
The transition from two to four children was undoubtedly the most challenging for me.
Suddenly, daddy and mummy are outnumbered! Our family dynamic shifted, and there
were more little hands to hold, more mouths to feed, and more hearts to nurture. It
required a significant adjustment in terms of time management, emotional energy, and
financial resources.
Parenting is a team effort or in my case, an entire village and the collective wisdom of
many to raise my four children. With the support of my extended family, my domestic
helpers, the children’s teachers, my parenting coach and fellow mummies, I’ve embraced
this otherwise difficult chapter and found humour in the chaos.
3. Are there any fears you have as a mom of multiple children.
One fear that often crosses my mind as a mom of four is whether I am giving each child
the individual attention and support they need to thrive. With a bustling household and a
demanding career, it can sometimes feel overwhelming to ensure that each child feels
seen, heard, and valued. However, I've learned to prioritize quality over quantity,
cherishing the moments we share together and making the most of the time we have.
4. If you are working, tell us how you juggle that with your family life, and what a day
in your life looks like. And if you're a sahm, tell us about what you used to do before
you made the switch, and what your day typically looks like.
As the Co-Founder and CEO of The Great Room, my days are filled with the exhilarating
whirlwind of entrepreneurship, leadership, and creativity. Juggling the demands of running
a growth business with the joys of motherhood requires careful advance planning,
flexibility, and a supportive network.
In my household, the kids know my chant “If we fail to plan, we plan to fail”.
A typical day for me starts early at 6 am. It’s breakfast with the kids where we try to get
dressed, eat breakfast, pack lunchboxes, take supplements and talk about our respective
‘1 important thing of the day’.
Then after some me-time which could be strength training, rowing or journaling on different
dats, it’s a flurry of design meetings, strategic planning sessions with my team, site visits
and e-mails. On most days, I end my physical meetings by 2 pm so I am with the children
in the afternoons till their bedtime at around 8 pm. On some days, my second work shift
starts at 9pm when I have virtual meetings with my US team.
We have no TV at home and do not have a habit of watching TV regularly. We draw and
craft a lot and that means being comfortable with ‘the beautiful mess’ at home.
We are also big readers. I read in both languages almost every day to the children since
they were born. Since last year, my older girls read aloud in Mandarin to me everyday so
that they build fluency. Other times, we all silent read together after dinner.
I think balance is a fallacy. You have to consciously choose what is important - what are
the glass balls you can’t afford to drop and what are the rubber balls that can bounce
around a bit. Every day, I vote with my time and my actions to show up for what is
important to me. I am so aware that statistically, 70% of the time we spend with our kids
happen before they turn 12, I am using my time and energy wisely.
5. Do you ever feel overwhelmed by the demands of motherhood, and can you
describe a time you felt that way? How did you navigate through it?
All too often.
One particularly challenging time was when I was juggling the responsibilities of launching
a new business while also being present for my children during a difficult transition period.
In those moments, I leaned heavily on my support network, reaching out to my partner,
family, and friends for guidance and encouragement. I also learned the importance of self-
care and taking moments of respite to recharge and refuel my spirit. Through it all, I've
come to realize that its okay to ask for help and that vulnerability is not a weakness but a
strength.
6. How do balance nurturing your children's individuality while fostering a sense of
unity within your family?
Balancing nurturing each child's individuality with fostering a sense of unity within our
family is a delicate dance.
We’re a very ‘chatty’ and expressive family. Since the children were really young, we
started going around the table to answer questions like “What is the best thing that
happened to me today?”, “One kind thing I did today was…”, “I am most afraid that people
think I am…”
We celebrate each child's unique interests, passions, and talents, encouraging them to
explore their creativity and express themselves authentically. At the same time, we
emphasize the importance of mutual respect, empathy, and collaboration to foster a sense
of belonging within our family.
7. What sacrifices have you made for your children, and do you have any regrets?
Those who are close to me sometimes say in half-jest that my superpower is that I am
really good at suffering.
As a mother, like my mother and other mothers, I’ve made countless sacrifices for my
children—sacrifices of time, energy, and personal ambitions.
However, I wouldn't call them regrets. Rather, I see them as investments in the future of
my children and our family. Each sacrifice has been made with love and a deep sense of
commitment to nurturing and supporting my children as they navigate life's journey. While
there may be moments of exhaustion or frustration along the way, the rewards far
outweigh any sacrifices, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
8. What has been the toughest challenge in your life as a mom? And how did you
get through that?
One of the toughest challenges I've faced as a mom was learning to let go of perfectionism
and embrace the messiness of motherhood.
The mess is real. Dinner time is messy. Hope and disappointments are messy.
Conversations are messy. Non-conversations are even messier.
In a world filled with societal expectations and pressure to excel in every aspect of life, it
can be easy to fall into the trap of comparison and self-doubt. However, I've learned to
prioritize authenticity, presence, and connection over perfection, embracing the
imperfections and finding beauty in the chaos. By cultivating a sense of gratitude,
practicing self-compassion, and surrounding myself with a supportive community, I've
learned to navigate the ups and downs of motherhood with grace and resilience.
9. Can you share a moment when you felt immense pride in your role as a mother? Or can
you look back on a moment where you've thought, this was all worth it.
Motherhood is a rigged game. Every time I think it’s too much, my children mysteriously
throws me a bone and I willingly and thoroughly forget the pain. Some are unexpected
small moments and others are epic wonders.
My daughter, Louise, who was 9 years old, came home and told me that she wanted to
help collect used textbooks from school. A few weeks later, NTUC’s Share-a-Textbook
Programme Administrator reached out to say that Louise and her friend, Serena, had
collected 11 full boxes of old textbooks! They had made posters, gone classroom to
classroom to tell their schoolmates about their collection boxes in the library. NTUC Share-
a-Textbook is a 40 year old programme where they collect used textbooks outside the
supermarkets and this is the first time a collection was done in a school - a student-led
initiative! Louise’s initiative, creativity, kindness, heart and hustle made me so so proud. I
felt that despite it all, I must’ve done something right!
10. Looking back on your journey, what advice would you give to other mothers who
may be facing similar challenges? (Or debating whether or not to have more
children.)
My advice to other mothers facing similar challenges is simple:
1. Be clear what your glass balls and rubber balls are through your own seasons of life.
Make that choice with clear eyes.
2. Be long term greedy. When you are long term greedy, you are kinder to yourself and
the people around you. Time is a great compounder and the small things add up. I
may only ready for 10 - 20 minutes a day but I think I’ve read over 1000 stories to my
children collectively.
3. Motherhood is a wild ride. Whether the situation is good or bad, I always tell myself
“This soon shall pass”.
It's okay to not have all the answers or to feel overwhelmed at times. And definitely do not
keep re-plying other ‘perfect mothers’ highlight reels on IG, it’s ok not to eat organic or
have homemade playdoh.
And to those debating whether or not to have more children, I would say trust your
instincts and listen to your heart. Only you can know what's right for your family, and
whatever path you choose, know that you are capable, resilient, and stronger than you
think.
0 comments